Parents In Moderation
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- 11/24/2007 |
- 10:00 am
Some parents invest little or no time in their child's education. Others, it seems, don't know when to stop. How about we all meet in the middle? Here are some thoughts...
I have a friend who only eats two M&Ms at a time. Two. While everyone else will pop a handful (followed by another handful), she will pull out a couple, let them sit in her mouth until they dissolve, and she'll be satisfied. In her opinion, eating too many is irresponsible, but eating none is out of the question.
The old adage '˜everything in moderation' is most often associated with eating and drinking, but it applies to parental involvement with a kid's education, as well.
On one hand, it makes a noticeable difference when parents take an active interest (emphasis on active) in Ashleigh's and Justyn's studies. Fifteen minutes a day not watching American Idol or Dancing With The Stars could be fifteen minutes helping the child understand decimal places, or reading '“ yes, reading '“ the short story they just composed.
Instead, too many parents balk at the idea. After all, that's THE SCHOOL'S RESPONSIBILITY! For some, their contribution to the kid's academic development consists of giving them a creative spelling on a traditional name. 'œThere, that should give them a head-start on life. My work here is done.'쳌
But, on the other hand'¦
I don't know who coined the phrase '˜helicopter parent,' but it's beautiful. I first noticed the phenomenon while coaching youth sports. It was always nice to see a parent playing catch with their child, or pitching to them in the park, giving the kid a couple dozen extra swings that they wouldn't squeeze in at our practices.
Some couldn't stop there, of course. They had to patrol every inch of the field during practice, yelling out advice while I was in the middle of a teaching moment. One man even walked onto the football field and began to adjust his son's three-point-stance'¦as we were starting to run a play.
I asked a friend of mine who teaches sixth grade this question: Would you rather have parents who have no involvement with their child's education, or parents who suffocate the kid, often contradicting your lesson with their own academic wisdom.
She had to think about it for a minute.
It's not unusual for a teacher to work hard on a project, only to have a few helicopter parents take things into their own hands and undermine hours and hours of progress. It's as if they are practicing some bizarre marriage between public and home schooling.
An active interest mean complementing the teacher's efforts (not to be confused with complimenting, although that would be appreciated, too). Find the areas where Jhordynn and Jaedyn need a few extra reps, and sit down at the dining room table and puzzle it out together. You'll be amazed at the results. Believe me.
And then, to celebrate, you can bond over two M&Ms. Just two.
